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Kitty Wigs, Puppy Tweets and Other Funny Pet Products

By Julia Williams

It’s impossible to know just how many pet lovers there are in the world. The Pet Food Institute estimates there are around 75 million pet dogs and 85 million pet cats in the U.S. alone. Our penchant for pets did not go unnoticed by inventors either, as evidenced by the staggering number of pet-related products available today. Many of them are useful and necessary, while others are just plain dumb. Here are a few of my favorite funny pet products.

Kitty Wigs are colorful hairpieces created for fashionable cats. Technically, one might argue these are really wigs for cat owners, especially those who don’t mind their bodies being used as scratching posts. Or as one cat said on a pet blog I read, “If the Human ever put one of those wigs on me, she'd need a transfusion.” Kitty Wigs cost $60 and come in four colors. Founder Julie Jackson says “the wigs are NOT toys but a way to spend some fun time with your cat….especially fun for photo sessions.” Don’t laugh – with more than 5,ooo fans on Facebook and a selling-like-hotcakes book (Glamourpuss: The Enchanting World of Kitty Wigs) it seems there are legions of people who love Kitty Wigs. My take: they’re cute, but I like my limbs scratch-free, thank you very much. 

Fur Ever Keepsakes are made from your pet’s hair! You brush your pet, send in your fur and receive the handspun yarn back, or you can have it custom-made into a scarf, mittens, hat, photo frame, pillow, stuffed bear, bookmark and more. VIP Fibers claims to have spun over 1,858 pounds of pet fiber to date, producing nearly 2 million yards of keepsake yarn. My take: gives new meaning to pet owners who want Fluffy and Fido to be with them “furever.” 

Puppy Tweets: just about every dog who’s “anybody” has a Twitter account nowadays. But since typing without opposable thumbs is problematic, Fido usually needs an assistant to help him tweet. Not anymore! Mattel’s “Puppy Tweets” is a tiny electronic device that attaches to your dog’s collar. Once you connect the included USB receiver to your computer and download the software, Puppy Tweets translates your pooches barks and movements into humorous tweets. With more than 500 different phrases, your dog will always be the wittiest four-legger on Twitter. He’ll regale his followers with gems like “L'il help! Nose stuck in bird feeder!” “I've got a new leash on life!” and “I finally caught that tail I've been chasing, and ...OOUUUCHH!” Just don’t come crying to me when you realize that your dog has more followers than you do.

Cat’s Tongue Chocolates are made in Vienna by Demel, but can be ordered and shipped from their New York store. I’d not seen these until recently, but apparently they’ve been around for a really long time. My take: Who thinks up crazy things like chocolates in the shape of a cat’s tongue? I don’t know if I could eat them, but I want these for the super cute vintage box alone!

Pet Perfume: if your dog stinks but there’s no time for a bath, just dab on some Sexy Beast Signature Canine Fragrance and you’re good to go. One online pet boutique sells an extensive collection of doggie cologne priced from $10 to $3,000 (yikes!). My take: I seriously doubt any pet perfume could cover up the lovely smell of Eau de Dog. Just Say No! Seriously, if you really have an aversion to soap and water, let the groomer give your dog a bath.

Kitty Wigs photo by Jill Johnson

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