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Why Pet Owners Need a Great Sense of Humor

By Linda Cole

Facebook has some really great cat and dog pictures. The other day I saw one with a sad looking dog sitting on a sofa. Scattered around him was the remains of a couch pillow. According to the words on the picture, “it wasn't his fault” – the darn pillow just exploded on its own! That picture reminded me of the time I came home and discovered the tattered remains of a couple of couch pillows that had mysteriously “exploded,” scattering feathers all over the living room, scaring my dogs half to death. Anyway, I'm sure that was their story. I learned a long time ago that pet owners need to have a really good sense of humor!

What's in the sacks, Mom?

It doesn't matter if you're carrying in CANIDAE pet food or sacks of groceries. Pet owners have the doggie/kitty two step down, and the one legged kick back on the door to close it before a pet can make it through the open door. We've also perfected the pet waltz. The one, two, three dance around the pets on your way to the kitchen, skillfully missing paws while keeping inquisitive noses out of the bags of food.

Muddy paws

OK, I know it's not my dogs' fault when it rains, and they still need to go outside to do their business. Now, my dogs hate going out in the rain and they tippy toe outside as if their feet will melt the minute they touch wet grass. However, that all changes if there's something to bark at. My question is, why do they always end up in the one muddy patch in the yard? And what is it about rain and muddy paws that makes a normally quiet dog go berserk and race around on a clean floor after coming back inside?

Hairy guests

Enter the home of a pet owner at your own risk and never wear dark clothes. I'm convinced that a guest in your home will find the hairiest chair or section on the couch. It's almost as if the pet hair fairy swooped in just as the person was sitting down and dumped a sack full of hair under them.

Window art

My pets are definitely miniature “Picassos with fur.” Their nose and tongue art on a window is as unique as they are. I firmly believe a cat or dog cannot stand to be in the presence of a clean window and one of their missions in life is to make sure all windows within their reach has been decorated with nose and tongue art. Dogs like to add their own special signature by including a muddy paw print here and there.

Window coverings 

As far as cats are concerned, curtains are hung for their amusement and climbing pleasure. Mini blinds are a cats worst enemy and must be destroyed at all costs, and window shades were made for cats to slice through with their claws. It's like the pirate movies where the good guy slides down the sail using his knife. I no longer allow my cats to watch pirate movies!

The morning or 3 A.M. stare

You know the “look.” That intent stare from your dog or cat patiently waiting for your sleepy eyes to focus in on them. “Oh good, you're awake. Breakfast time.” I've learned to ignore their pitiful eyes and wait for the playful slap alongside the head before getting up.

Sharing the bed with pets

Why is it when pets sleep in a bed, they like to stick their hind end up next to you and push so you end up holding on to the edge of the mattress and they end up with the rest of the bed? And I'm not talking about a large dog. What's worse is the pets that insist on lying on top of the covers, on each side of you, pinning you underneath them.

Walking the dog

You meet another dog owner and stop to chat for a few minutes. To your horror, you notice your dog just peed on the other person's pants leg, but they didn't notice it. Well, I'm not ratting on my own dog.

As a lifelong pet owner, I've learned that pillows will “explode” from time to time. Pet hair can be removed and blinds can be replaced. Never leave the TV remote where a dog can find it, and always guard a perfectly cooked Thanksgiving turkey with your life. Pets will be pets, and the best thing pet owners can do is maintain a good sense of humor. Our pet’s unconditional love is what's most important, and so is a good laugh. Those are the memories that stay in our heart when a pet says goodbye. Treasure the moments you have with a pet, because they are priceless.

Dog photo by Rob and Stephanie Levy
Cat photo by Carlos Castro

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