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10 Things to Consider Before Getting a Dog

Women are fond of saying “men are dogs”.

Some dogs may be more than a bit insulted, with that remark . Nevertheless, there are many similarities between men and dogs.

Living together with a man is a big deal. Suddenly, we have to put up with his many bad habits, all of the time. Living together with a dog, is an even bigger deal. With dogs, it is truly a “till death do us part” commitment. Since dogs are totally dependent on us, there is no such thing as a divorce.

When we agree to bring a dog into our family, we are making that commitment for life.

And just like men, dogs have an array of bad habits.

Therefore, before getting a dog, we want to first consider some of their less than desirable traits.

Should I Get a Dog 1

Dogs Snore Like Drunken Sailors.

This is my cute little Siberian Husky girl, Shania. She is the sweetest thing ever, but at night, she snores like a really large, really drunk, sailor.

At least when a man snores, we can give him a swift kick, and make him turn to the side. This will usually stop the snoring.

My Husky girl, bless her heart, will snore in whatever position she is in.

Should I Get a Dog 2

Dogs Are Expert Stalkers.

I think that the Police song, Every Breath You Take, was composed for a dog. Dogs like following us everywhere, and they watch everything that we do.

My Shiba Inu likes sitting outside, and staring at passers-by, cars, and everything else.

He is known by some of my neighbors as “the little detective”.

If he could talk, I bet he would have some really juicy stories to tell!

Should I Get a Dog 3

Dogs Are Not Ashamed of Begging.

My dogs learned really early on that their most powerful weapon is not their teeth, but their pretty face.

Dogs are willing to do about anything to get what they want, and that includes begging. Beware! They are very, very, good at it, and they will do it whenever they want something from us, which is almost all of the time.

Should I Get a Dog 4

A Dog’s Favorite Perfume is Eau De Skunk.

A dog’s favorite scent is not Dior, CK, or even Old Spice. Rather, they like dead things that smell like, well, dead things. Rolling around in a dead thing to acquire that oh-so-quaint aroma, is often the highlight of a dog’s day.

Smelling and eating poop is also a favorite activity. My Siberian Husky Shania, treats bird poop like it is caviar. What the cat, horse, and goat left behind, is also on her favorite list of foods and scents.

Should I Get a Dog 5

Dogs Are Landscaping Addicts.

We may think that our yard is perfect or close to perfect, but our dogs know better.

Yards often have a boring, flat surface, look. All dogs know that the most interesting, beautiful yards, are the ones that have the most number of holes.

Dogs are such optimists that they always have a can dig attitude. Even when our entire yard is riddled with holes, they always find a way to add just one more. Finally, all the holes combine into one large, big, flat hole, and the process starts all over again.

Should I Get a Dog 6

Dogs Drool, Belch, and Fart.

Dogs live in the moment.

They will drool, fart, belch, and whatever else, in the moment as well. Think Homer Simpson, except much cuter, and with more hair.

Should I Get a Dog 7

Dogs Are Lazy About Personal Hygiene.

When women say “men are dogs“, this is probably one of the key reasons why.

Like men, dogs will sometimes clean themselves, but most of the time, they prefer to just lie around, watch t.v., and go to sleep. Even when we offer to give them a bath, brush their teeth, clip their nails, and wipe their muddy paws, they will object in the most virulent fashion.

The best way to get a man, err I mean dog, to let us groom him, is to pair grooming with something pleasant. Using a favorite food, often does the trick.

Should I Get a Dog 8

Dogs Shed, and Shed, and Shed.

Dogs are cute, and cuddly because they have all that soft, plush, silky hair that we love running our fingers through.

What they often fail to advertise, is that the hair comes off – all over the house.

The amount of shedding varies greatly by dog breed, so careful research is a must. Before getting a dog, make sure that we are not allergic to dog dander. Also get used to having hair all over our floors, furniture, clothes, and other prized possessions.

Frequent brushing, will help ensure that the hair comes off in a more controlled, and manageable fashion. I find that a Furminator is very helpful, especially for dogs with double coats.

Should I Get a Dog 9

Dogs Think that the World is Their Toilet.

Dogs, especially puppies, find it extremely inconvenient to have to go to the toilet, like we do. Interrupting dog play for a trip to the loo, seems like a big waste of time. Therefore, they will just do it on the go. After all, they have unpaid human servants to clean up after them, so life is good.

The best way to potty-train a dog, is to teach him that toileting outside is more fun than a Chuck-E-Cheese trip.

My Siberian Husky puppy was not easy to house-train, because she did not seem to mind frolicking in her own waste products. As soon as she has to go, which is when she wakes up, and after every 10-15 minutes of play-time; I take her outside and give her the “Go Potty” command.

When she goes potty, I praise her very well and give her yummy treats and affection. Then, she goes back to playing. Very quickly, she learned to go sit by the door whenever she needed to go potty. After all, pottying inside gets her nothing, but pottying outside, is a happy bonanza of praise, treats, attention, and play.

Should I Get a Dog 10

A Dog’s Favorite Chew Toy is Everything.

Before we bring a puppy or new dog home, make sure to store away all of our prized possessions.

I do not leave my Jimmy Choo shoes around, or it will quickly become designer rawhide. Make sure to put cell-phones, iPhones, iPods, and all other expensive equipment on a high shelf.

Proper puppy training and puppy management is a must. When puppy Shania is out and about, I supervise her very closely. When I am too busy to supervise, she goes in her crate or long-term enclosure. I also provide her with many interactive, dog friendly, chew toys.

An iPhone may be coolest thing since sliced bread, but it is not friendly to a dog’s digestive system, nor is it friendly to our pocketbook when we pay the vet bill.
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